There's Always Light at the End of the Tunnel

Suicide according to the World Health Organization suicide is “the act of deliberately killing oneself.” This is true and I would never consider challenging this definition I would however elaborate on this definition making suicide the act of deliberately killing oneself when life is not worth living and when you have been trapped in darkness and unable to find hope for an extended period of time. From my experience this is how I would describe suicide. You could say that I didn’t want to die and in one sense I didn’t, had I really deep down wanted to die my first suicide attempt would have been successful and the second and the third, they would have all been successful if deep down I had really wanted to die. You could also say that I did want to die, I wanted to die to end my pain and suffering, I wanted relief, I wanted to be free and I wanted to be with the family who I have lost. You see, suicide isn’t as simple as someone wanting to die, it invo...

This day three years ago saw my first ever suicide attempt. Each year I dread this day and especially this year. This day three years ago I was preparing to sit my junior cert and yet again I am preparing to sit state exams. Sitting alone in my bedroom I had just finished writing my note, what I hoped to be my final note. I wrote it a thousand times to make it perfect I couldn't give my family anything less than perfect. I placed it under my pillow; I knew they would look under my pillow eventually. I grabbed a towel from the hot press and went back into my room. Shutting the door slowly trying not to make any noise. I didn't want anything to ruin my plan, I couldn't let anybody come into my room, I had put too much planning into this for something to go wrong, it all had to be perfect. I sat on my bed, my legs crossed and glancing out the window I took a deep breath, I was ready. After spending the day with my brother and dad I was ready, I was ready to take my own life...

IF you are feeling suicidal or if you are self-harming there is help out there. There are places to go and talk to people and there is hope that things will get better. One place you can go to if you wish to seek help in overcoming your self-harm is Pieta House. I attended pieta house for one appointment (if I had gone sooner I wouldn’t have ended up to hospital a week later) and first impressions were this place could really help me. It was relaxed and the staff were welcoming and non-judgemental. It was a very friendly environment and to be honest I wish I had gone earlier for treatment! “We are a Suicide and Self-Harm Crisis Centre, offering an accessible, confidential and free-of-charge counselling service. ” So if you are self-harming and in need of some help why not try talking to someone at Pieta house. These services are free of charge and all staff are fully qualified and willing to help those in need and bring about social change.  You can contact Pieta House i...

Scars. I once knew a girl. Who forever had scars and cuts upon her arms. Hope was insribed. Not in the colour of ink. But in the colours of the scars. With stitches on her skin. Plus tears in her eyes. And bumpy scars. Filled with hate and shame. For whats she done. But she'll do it again. She once saw someone. They asked what is that on your arms. Ciggerette burns came the reply. Deep inside the girl was lost. I once saw myself drowned in tears. Cant understand the purpose of my being. For the cuts and scars. The pain goes so much deeper Amy Kerswell I wake up every morning and I am greeted with the painful sight of my arms covered in scars. Many people might think that it is just my arms but it’s not. The scars are everywhere inside and outside. Many of my scars reflect the pain I have suffered in my life but many are there because I was addicted to self-harm. I once wanted these scars; I’m not going to lie. I...