Here is a video involved with the Lets talk campaign.

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You are not alone.


Mental illness can affect anybody!

Even celebrities can suffer from mental illness. It can happen to anybody at anytime but we can all over come our difficulties.

Removing the stigma.

I found this and thought that it was a great video and decided to share it on my blog.

Why do people SH?

Many people SH for many different reasons so there is no way that I can write this post telling people all of the reasons as to why people self harm because everybody has their own reasons for doing it. My reasons for self harming in short are because it makes me feel in control of my life and also because it is better than thinking about the bad memories that I have from my past but I do know that SH is not the way to deal with the feelings that I have and you should certainly not SH.

There are many other ways of coping with feelings and emotions that we have and it is really just about finding the thing that works for you. Weather it is talking, exercise, using a stress ball, going out with friends anything is better than self harm because once you start it its very hard to stop because it becomes an addiction and can take a long time to stop.

Think about yourself for a bit now and answer some of these questions.:
What would your life be like if you didnt self harm?
Who is the one person you think can most understand what you are feeling?

These questions have not just randomly;y come out of my head they have come out of a work book that I am using in hospital to help me get to learn more about  my self harm and know myself better. The book is called "Stopping the pain" I have found this book very useful so far and i would suggest for other people to use it too.

 Keep strong and things will get better.

What do you know about SH?

Many people dont know a whole lot about self-harm. More people need to begin to talk about self-harm so that people who do SH dont feel like they need to keep it a secret. Im not trying to promote SH or anything like that but I think that people need to become more aware of this and need to be more open and understanding about it so that more people might feel able to come forward and talk about what is going on for them and find ways that they can cope better than using SH.
While I have been learning more about SH I have learned some things that people think about SH that are not true and I think that people need to stop thinking these things and realise that SH can happen to anybody at anytime!
Only a few very sick people SH....This is not true at all. Anybody can SH at anytime in their lives.
Teens who SH are trying to commit suicide.... This is also not true. Many people who SH do it because it is a way of coping. If you self-harm it doesnt mean that you want to die. SH an suicide are two very different things.
People who SH are crazy and should be put in hospitals... NOT TRUE at all believe  me if you SH it does not mean that you are crazy so dont let anybody tell you different. If you self harm you are not crazy and you should not be put in hospital, sometimes it might help to be in hospital but just because you self harm it doesnt mean that you have to be in a hospital.
People who self harm are just trying to get attention... this is also not true because many people who self harm keep it a secret and are ashamed of what  they have done so they hide it and they dont let people know.

More needs to be done to get rid of the stigma that is attached to self harm and they need to stop think of people who self harm as crazy or mental. Its true that not everybody thinks this way about SH and Im glad that my friend do think of me in this way because they know about my self harm. It is time that we become more open about SH and let people know that they can get help and that they dont need to be ashamed! Things need to begin to change now and I am hoping that my blog might help change some ways that people think about mental health difficulties!

Stay strong and things will get better.

SH doesnt have to be a secret.

When I first started to self-harm I didn’t tell anybody and take this from someone who knows that keeping it to yourself is not a good idea believe me. You might feel scared, nervous ,ashamed and so many other feelings and emotions when you start to think about  telling someone but once you do tell someone you may begin to feel a lot better…. I know I did. Not having to keep it this huge big secret anymore was a huge relief and it was a giant weight taken off my shoulders. Letting someone know can make a huge difference to your life…. You might not think it now but I sure know that if I hadn’t told someone I would not be here writing this post right now today because I would be too busy self-harming.

You might feel that your parents will me mad, disappointed but sometimes you can actually be surprised about how your parents react to things like this. I know that I was surprised by my dad’s reaction when he found out that I was self-harming. Now that he knows I am getting the help that I need and I know that everything that he is doing for me he is doing it so that I can get better.

If you want to tell a parent or a guardian and you don’t know how you could always write a letter or send an email or something like that. You could also tell someone close to you that you trust that can help you get over yourself harming but who can also help you tell your parent or guardian. You don’t have to keep this to yourself you really don’t. It is ok to tell someone and too look for help it really is. You might think that you do not deserve help but you do! 

Its ok to tell people and things can get better if you do, you don’t need to do this yourself so don’t be afraid to ask for help!

Stay strong and things will get better.

Self-Harm emergency kit.

The other day I was doing some work on learning how to cope with my self harm and one of the things I learned that would be useful for me is to make a self harm emergency kit. This kit would have things that you feel that could help you when you are feeling very low and you are struggling with the urges to self harm. This box could be big or small and have as much things or as little things in it that you want. You can even be able to bring it around with you if you feel like it will help you.

The things that I would like to have in my self harm emergency kit are:

Photos of me and my friends.
Photos of my mam and grandad.
Photos of me and my family.
Some nice sented candles.
A stress ball.
A rubber band.
Some soft fabric.
A pen and some paper.

Im sure as I think of it more and more I might add some more things to my list but right now I am happy with all of the things that I can put in my emergebncy kit because I feel that if I was struggling with my urges things like looking at photos might help me to remember some happy times in my life and they would also me a ver good distraction for me to help take my mind off things.

For anybody who is struggling with self harm it would be a good idea to make a self harm emergency kit well at least I think it would be. Im going to be doing a lot more work on things like distraction so if I come across anymore usefull things I will write about them here so they this blog might hopefully act as a resource for someone who is going throught a very diffcult and who is struggling with self har. And rememeber it is nothing to be ashamexd about and you should not be embarrsed to ask for help. Nobody wants to self harm no matter how much they say they do somewhaere deep deep down inside they know that they really need to stop but they just need a bit of help along the way.

If anybody has any sugesstions of things they would like to see here on my blog just send me an email and I will try and write about them and also feel free to send me an email anytime you want to if you feel like having a chat... Im always here if people need me.

And remember stay strong and things will get better.

Mental health.

I have written this post before and I have decided to publish it again because it is something that I have experienced in my life and I think it is really important that we begin to talk about it now rather than later. Many people don't like talking about things like self-harm or suicide but we need to talk about these things to help prevent them from happening as much as they are happening now. People also don't like talking about mental health difficulties and they are far more common than you think. I have mental health difficulties myself and I have found that many people don't talk about them and that there is a huge stigma attached to people who have mental health problems. People also have a view of hospitals for people who are mentally ill and I can assure you now that they are not like what you see in the movies..... they are completely different! Right now I don't have time to write a post on mental health but I will get writing it on paper and then when I have time at home on leave or enough time here in the hospital I will type it up and publish it because we need to talk about it and we need to learn that it is nothing to be ashamed about and that a mental illness could happen to anybody and that it is more common than you think! Here is the post that I have written before about self- harm. This is what I now about self-harm and this post is written from having my own experiences knowing different people who have self-harmed. Please take the time to read this and well just remember this can happen to anybody and it is important that if you know someone who is struggling that you reach out to them and show them that you care and that you are there to support them and listen to them!

What I am going to write about in this post I guess is something that most people know about but nobody talks about it. In this blog post I am going to write about self-harm. As I was writing this blog post I was worried about publishing it to be honest and I don’t really know why. I think it was because I was scared of what people might think and if it might cause people to get upset. I don’t mean for this to be triggering to anybody and I don’t mean for this to upset anybody.
Self harming is the deliberate harm to you. This can be done in many different ways. Some people cut while others burn or scratch. There are many different ways that people self harm but most people who do self harm do it for the same reason, to cope with what is going on in their life at the time. This topic is very close to me because I know of people who have self harmed and the struggle that they go through on a daily basis to try and not self harm. People often think that if you self –harm you are suicidal but that is not true and most people who do self-harm are only looking for a release and no to die. There is often stigmas attached to people who self-harm and many are also judged because they do it and excluded from groups of people.
Many people who have self-harmed in the past are ashamed of it and try to cover up and hid their scares because of fears that the might be judged. Most people keep it a secret until they have had enough and realized that they don't need this anymore and that they can change and that things will get better. Many people who self-harm may also be depressed and can feel ashamed that they are but there is a quote that I think is really important for any one suffering fro depression and it is " depression is not a sign of weakness but a sign that you have been strong for too long" I hope that this quote will comfort some people who struggle from depression.
Most people self harm as a way of relief and expressing their feelings. Many people find it hard to talk about their feeling and eventually it all gets to be too much for them and they take all of their anger and frustration out on themselves. Its certainly not a good way of dealing with things but for some people it is the only way that they know how. Often for people who do self-harm it can turn into an addiction depending on self harming to help get you through the day and to communicate with people how you feel.
The aim of writing this blog post was to help raise awareness about self harm not just in Ireland but all over the world. Many people know about self harm and it is a very important topic and people need to talk about it but I feel that people don’t want to talk about it. I sometimes get the feeling that people are scared to talk about these kind of topics but if we don’t talk about them then we will never be able to move on and provide more help to the people who are struggling from self –harm. Most people who self-harm feel alone and ashamed but they are not alone there are many people all over the world in the same position as they are.
For anybody who is reading this blog post who self harms just remember that you are not alone and that it is never too late to get help. No one chooses to self harm but you can choose to get help. There are many places around Ireland including Pieta house.

Here is another post related to mental health that I have written before. This one is related to depression.
written a post about self-harm before and well now I think it’s time to write one about depression seeing as how often the two topics can be related. In my opinion depression is a lot like self harm in the way that people often don’t like talking about the subject. It seems to be something that you would only talk about if you knew someone who suffers from it or you yourself suffer from it.

I grew up not hearing anything about depression; the only thing that I knew about it was that if you were depressed you were sad. In some ways that’s all you really need to know when you’re growing up because often you wouldn’t find yourself being depressed or even know someone who is depressed. It wasn’t until I entered secondary school where I learned more about depression and that wasn’t even through school that I learned about it. I guess I learned about it from my own experience and it was when I entered third year when I learned what depression really was when I was diagnosed with depression.
To be honest I didn’t think much of it because it wasn’t bad depression and I wasn’t put on medication, it was something I didn’t talk about not even with my dad or brothers, when we were told we all just got on with it and didn’t even think twice. Sure none of my friends even really knew that I had depression either because I tried my best not to let them see me suffering and when I was around them I put on a smile and acted as if everything was ok. I just got on with things after I was told and soon I felt back to my normal self when I was heading into transition year, because I had learned how to deal with things and I was going into Transition year a new Siobhán from the Siobhán I had been during the summer.
I was still getting treatment every week by going to a psychologist and talking about things that had happened in the past and I guess if I wasn’t talking about things every week I would not have been able to cope with things. I didn’t think of myself as being depressed and I think that was because it was only my family knew about it and I was able to deal with it. Now after having a relapse and a very bad one at that only my family and closest friends know about it and well now the world wide web know about it too and I’m hoping that by telling my story it will help to raise awareness about teenage depression.
After this relapse I was put on medication and well I have to say it took some convincing and that’s because I was both scared and also worried about what people will think of me when they found out. The only thing that was going through my mind was if people found out that I was on medication that they would think I was crazy. After someone close to me convinced me that they would help if I gave them time to work and that things will get better I decided that it was worth a shot and then things might start to look up for me.
After I got put on medication I stopped seeing myself as depressed and it was more that I just suffered from depression and it wasn’t a big deal. I may sometimes still try to put a smile on my face so people don’t realise that I’m suffering. It’s not that I’m trying to hide things it’s just that I don’t want to be pitted or looked down on because I’m suffering. I’m not ashamed of suffering from depression and it has taken a bit of time for me to be ok with it and writing this blog post about my experience was a big step for me and I am happy that I have done it and well I don’t mind if people know that I suffer from depression because I’m not ashamed and I will overcome it and things will get better for me.
It’s taken me a while to see the bright side of this because I couldn’t see past the next 5 minutes a couple of weeks ago now I know that things will get better And I am hopeful that I will overcome it and that is mainly because of the people around me who support me and because I want to get better and to show people around me that it is possible. I am determined to get back on the right track and someday I will hopefully be able to look back on my experience and say to myself that I did good and I have come a long way from there and I want to be proud of who I am even if that means I was a teenager who suffered from depression. Hopefully I will be able to go on from here knowing that my teenage years will have moulded me into hopefully the person I want to be.
I hope that this post might help someone who is reading it and suffering from depression. I haven’t got over this and I know that it will take some time but with people around me who love and care for me that things will get better sooner or later. It just takes time and you have to be patient with things. When I’m better I will hopefully be able to write a blog post giving advice about what I found helpful during my treatment and trying to overcome this.

Here is another post that I have written in the past relating to mental health difficulties. This post is relating to suicide and suicide prevention day.

Today is suicide prevention day and well I decided to write a blog post about it. To be honest I’m going to make this a very personal post because well suicide is something that I have dealt with in my life and something such as suicide prevention means a lot to me. I have written a lot of very personal post and well that’s because I am trying to share my story and help people who are going through hard times. I mean if things that I write show people that there is hope and even if you think things aren’t going to get any better they will. I have gone through some hard times and I still kind of am and most of the time I find it hard to see that there is hope and things will get better but with the help of some very close friends I know that things will get better even if I don’t think that things will my friends assure me that they will.

So today is suicide prevention day and well I attempted suicide in 2010 two days before my junior cert started. Many people thought that I did it because of the stress of the exams that I was about to do but it wasn’t, there wear many reasons and if I was to list them I would be here for a while so I’m just going to keep my reasons short. I did it because I felt lonely, isolated, depressed and that there was no point in living. There are many other reasons why I did this some were because of the loss of my mam, my problems with my IBS and yeah the stress of the exams had a part to play in it as well but they weren’t the only reasons. I just didn’t want to lie anymore; I thought people would be happier without me and that if I was to die I would be reunited with my mam.
I went up to my room because I was feeling like crap and took a piece of glass to my arm. I began to cut, I did manage to stop before it got to serious and then my dad found out in a matter of minutes after. I was taken to the hospital, crying, and upset annoyed and angry. I will never forget the look on my dad’s face when I told him that I wanted to die and that I did try and kill myself. I spent a week in the hospital and even done some of my exams there, I was watched by a nurse all day every day and not let out of their sight. When I was allowed go home it was on the grounds that I would be watched at home and that I would also go back to the hospital on a weekly basis to see a psychologist. I was allowed to go back to school but only if I was dropped to school, then collected and I was not allowed to leave the school if my dad was not there to collect me.
The point I am trying to get across here is that no matter how bad you are feeling and how bad things might seem ending your life is not what you want to do. I survived my suicide attempted and I am happy that I am still here. Yeah I might still be struggling with some problems and I find it hard sometimes to see my future but with the help of close friends I know that I want to be here right now. Anything thing that gets me down or upset now I think of it as being a bump in the road but I know once I get over this bump I will be back on track and trying to make things better for myself. If it wasn’t for one very important teacher in my life right now I don’t know where I would be, she helps me to realise that I need to focus on today and once I get through today I can work on getting through tomorrow. Just take things one day at a time. Doesn’t worry about all the stupid things going on around you, I always do that and it always gets me down but I’m slowly learning not to let them get me down.
The most important thing that you can do is talk to someone if you are feeling like you want to end it all. Believe me I have been there and I wish I didn’t try to take my own life but I can’t go back in time and I have to live with the scars for the rest of my life. Talk to anyone, a parent, a friend a sibling or even a teacher. Sure email me at if you need to talk to some who knows what you’re going through.
I know that there is a reason to live. I am still battling against my depression and IBS. I m going to get better, it will take a while and I do sometimes have trouble seeing the future and I do dwell on things that have happened in the past and feel sorry for myself but I am going to get better. There is hope and things will get better just talk to someone. Believe me things will get better.
In honour of all those people who died from suicide light a candle at 8pm tonight and place it near a window.

I know when you are feeling down it can be hard to cope trust me I know. I suffer from depression, anxity, OCD and other mental health diffculties. I know that many people wouldnt announce all of this on the internet for anybody to read but I want to get better, I am trying to get better. I have spent the last six weeks in hospital starting on the road to recovery and I know I still have a long way to go but since I have been here in hospital I have seen people get discharged and it has given me hope that some day I  will get discharged and move on with my life.  Im not ashamed or scared of telling people these things about me because I want people to know that they are not alone and that there is help out there.  By writing this post I am hoping that I will be able to spread the word about mental helth problems and hopefully people might start talking sabout it more and then the stigma might become less and less over time. I know its going to take more than me writing this post for things to change but I think its a start.I know that when I get discharged from hospital things will be better and hopefully I will be able to help raise awarness about things related to mental health. I hope that if you have read this post that you might think about how you view people with mental health diffculties and then ask yourself this one question. If I had a mental health diffcultie would I want people to think of me this way? I hope that this post has made you think!

New Year, New Me!!!

I know I know everybody says that at the new year things are going to be different and they are going to change and most of the time nothing happens. Well this has been the case with me many times before me and well as I have found myself writing thyis post in hospital I can say that things are going to change for me. It has taken me the past year to let things slip away from me, and now after spending six weeks in hospital and knowing that being discharged is not going to be anytime in the near future and having many conversations with nurses,doctors and very close friends I have learned that it is time that I start to change and I need to start working on getting better. It has taken me a while to realise this and well I am glad that I am finally starting to realise it. I know that the only person that can make me better is me and after today I am going to start working. I know its going to be hard but I know that with the friends and family that I have around me supproting  me I can do this and I will do this. I can get better and I will get better!

We all have our bad days and I guess that it is time that I put the bad days behine me and start looking forward to having some good days.So I guess if I have learned anything from the people who are close to me its that they want me to get better and I should want to get better for myself and I am going to get better for myself. It might take some time but I guess its time that I started to think a bit more positivle about things and stop looking on the bad side of life from now on. After all things can only get better from here. As they say Onwards and upwards. I am dertamined to get leave form the hospital during the week hopefully tomorrow and make a new start at my recovery... im putting my bad days behind me and I am going to start hoping for more good days. And if I happen to have a few bad days well I will take them as they come and work throught them. From here I am going to take things one day at a time and make sure I get better for my family, friends and me!

Its time I start looking at the good things that I have in life and stop taking them for granted. After all there is always light at the end of the tunnell and all thought I cant see it right now but there is a good life waiting for me out there and this will soon all be in the past. I will learn from my experiences and I will get better!
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