Reconnecting


Something happened to me about a week and a half ago, something which I never expected to happen and something which was really out of the blue, about a week and a half ago a family member from my mothers side made contact with me. I know you may be thinking what is so surprising about that but you have to understand that my interaction with my mothers side of the family decreased incredibly after her death.

A week and a half ago I received a friend request of Facebook from my godmother who also happens to be one of my mums cousins. Now initially I wasn't sure who the person was as a result of the change in last name but after a few moments it clicked with me who she was. Now I'm not great with building relationships and it is something which I have spent a lot of time working on both personally and professionally as a result of the nature of youth work but again it is still something which I can often struggle with. When accepting this friend request I didn't think anything would come from it, maybe a how are you here and there but nothing really and that's not because of the person who contacted me, it was because of the 9 year gap of not being in contact and my anxieties about engaging with my mothers side of the family for a fear of bringing up painful memories associated with her death etc.

Soon after I accepted the friend request a conversation was initiated on her behalf and in next to know time arrangements were made to meet up for coffee and a chat. I didn't have time to allow my anxieties to prevent me from saying yes to meeting up, which is something I am grateful for.  Not only did this coffee date allow me to have a chat with my godmother and get an insight into her life and that of her mother as she was also there it also allowed me establish further contact with that side of the family, contact which I intend to ensure continues. This chat which lasted for just an hour done something to me, it allowed something to develop, it created this sense of security, a sense of love and most of all it created a sense of closeness to my mum, something which I haven't felt for a while, something which I have been longing for but didn't quite know it until now.

Reflecting over the interaction with my mums side of the family and basically the whole process of my godmother taking the time to get in contact with me, despite the 9 year gap which was unpreventable as a result of family circumstances has really triggered something within me, it has allowed me to have a more positive aspect on life and it really and truly means the world to me. What has happened to me internally as a result of this reconnection with my mums side of the families something which words cannot describe and I would urge anybody who has lost touch with family or friends to take the first step and make the initiate contact, I only wish I could have been the one to initiate communication with my godmother but nonetheless it really can have an amazing effect on you internally as a person, it did for me and there is no reason it shouldn't for you.


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