There's Always Light at the End of the Tunnel

Once again I am very sorry for the lack of updates on my blog recently, I have been so busy with everything I just haven’t had a chance to sit down and write but that is all going to change! Ok so this post is going to be a bit different and I related to something with is very important to me.  When a person is suffering from self-harm they try to keep it a secret, they keep it hidden, an internal secret that they cannot trust anybody with. I know this because I was like that when I was self-harming. I would do everything and anything to hide my cuts, I would not tell a soul and I would avoid any awkward questions about why I wanted to wear long sleeves all the time especially in good weather. I went through all of the thoughts about what my family and friends would think, how people in society would judge me and what would happen to me if people found out that I was self-harming.  People think that often people who are self-harming are looking for attention but that is no...

Today I was thinking about writing about the budget that came out yesterday but then I remembered something important about this month, something positive and something, which I really want to share with you guys. On the 14 th of this month marked a very important day for me. The 14 th of this month marked 2 whole months without self-harm. The day before I got my leaving cert I was feeling low, anxious, lost and confused and I didn’t know what to do and as a result of all of these mixed feelings I took them out of myself to get some form of relief. It wasn’t a bad incident of self-harm but nevertheless it was still an incident of self-harm, which shouldn’t have happened, but it did and I regretted it. To be honest I hadn’t really thought about this important date until today and I am extremely proud of myself. I guess I am more proud of this 2 month milestone because for the past four/five months I haven’t had support from the adult services as there is a whole range o...

Today as part of my college course myself and a group of my peers were required to visit two youth work projects in Dublin’s inner city. This visit was a real eye opener for me, as I have never really worker with young people who are from disadvantaged backgrounds or in a youth club setting.  On the bus home after todays visits I found myself asking many questions about what does youth work really mean to me and what does working with young people give me. Well first of working with young people to me is encouraging and motivating them to engage in things they enjoy. It means working with them rather than for them to help improve their lives in some shape, way or form. It means I have to respect them in order for them to respect me and finally working with young people means helping bring about social change in a positive way to help young people learn the necessary skills to improve their lives, reach their full potential and help those around them too. Youth work give...

Having a mental illness is a confusing thing, you find yourself asking many question like why me?, is this real? and how do I make it go away. From experience I believe that it is ok to ask yourself and others these questions, it is important to work to try and understand your mental illness and to help yourself work through things.  At any age a mental illness is a hard and confusing thing but when you are already experiencing a confusing time it is even harder. This already confusing time which I am talking about is adolescents. During adolescents it is a time of experiments, finding yourself and learning new things. All of these things can be hard to manage and create many different questions but add a mental illness into that as your worlds is pretty much turned upside down, well thats how things were for me! While I was going through a tough time with my depression and spent time in hospital there was something which helped me to work through things and put things int...

This week saw the beginning of my college classes. As part of these class we have been working closely on bonding and getting to know each other in order to progress well throughout the next three years together. To allow us to get to know each other better and have a better understanding into each others life we were asked to prepare a life map and then make a presentation to our class regarding our life. I struggled with this assignment. I wasn't sure what I was going to share with my class. The fear of being judged, looked down on and treated like an outcast was at the forefront of my mind over the weekend in which I was preparing my presentation. I have decided to go into college and not tell people about my past, not because I am ashamed but because I wanted people to get to know me for who I am today but my past has made me the person who I am today. I fought with my mind the night before giving my presentation, my mind had all power and was controlling me. It was my mind w...

Bails of hay, real grass, some bunting and a picket fence on the side of the road in Dublin city centre, a site you couldn't miss, well unless you were me and walked right passed it without even noticing but I realised where I was meant to be when I saw some hay in the middle of the street! Today I attended park(ing) day in Dublin city centre to help hand out FREE stickers with the guys from See Change to encourage people to talk about mental health to break the stigma of metal health. If your like me you might not have a notion of what park(ing) day is because up until a couple of weeks ago I didn't know either. "PARK(ing) Day is a annual open-source global event where citizens, artists and activists collaborate to temporarily transform metered parking spaces into “PARK(ing)” spaces: temporary public places. The project began in 2005 when  Rebar , a San Francisco art and design studio, converted a single metered parking space into a temporary public pa...

On Monday I officially became a college student! Needless to say me being me I was very nervous and not very sure on what to expect. Thinking back now although today is only my third day I didn't really have anything to be nervous about. NUI Maynooth were more than welcoming, friendly and helpful. Beginning college is a new start for me, a start where nobody knows my background. Its not that I am ashamed of my past in terms of my depression and self harm but this new beginning in college allows me to have the chance to let people get to know me for me and not my past, people wont have the chance to judge me on my ill mental health and I am hoping it will stay that way. The aim of Label Jars Not People is to create a society where people with mental health issues are not judged, looked down on and seen as an outcast. My time here in Maynooth will be spent spreading the word of positive mental health and reducing stigma but it will also be a time for me to protect myself from the ...