New Beginnings

There comes a time in your life where you find yourself saying “It’s time” I have recently got to the point in my life where I have to say its time, its time for something new, its time to follow my dreams, its time to try and make my life different. 

The past year has been extremely difficult to me; it’s been a year with some highs and a lot of lows. I have found myself reaching rock bottom once again, spending time in hospital, reverting to old ways of coping, experiencing new levels of anxiety and having months of pure hopelessness, emptiness and despair. But among all that I had a lot of good, more specifically good people, people who have stuck by me, supported me and gave me tough love when I needed it most. It is these very people that have allowed me to get to the point where I am today, a point where I can say it is time for something new, it is time for me to change things in order to be better able to look after myself, control my emotions and have a life filled with happiness.

As I sit here writing this I find myself filled with so many different emotions, to many to name, some positive and some negative but emotions I need to feel, regardless of what they are, I need them. It is these emotions that have allowed me to fight back, get control, and work my way back up (albeit very slowly and continually) but I feel it, I feel some small amount of control coming back, coming back over my emotions, my thoughts, my feelings and finally my life!

In exactly 3 weeks I take the biggest step of my life, I leave my current employment to go and do something I love, to go and work as an EMT, something which for the past 18 months I have put my heart and sole into. It’s a new beginning, a chance for me to really step up and take control, a chance for me to look into the future and try and leave the past behind, it’s a chance for me to do something for me, to do what I want to do, and to let nothing stand in my way.

The past year has had many ups and downs which make this transition to my dream job all the more important. It shows me my resilience, my ability to get back up when I thought it wasn’t possible, it shows me that I can, and I will achieve my dreams. The past week has had me filled with so many emotions, happiness, excitement, sadness and so many more that I am finding myself beginning to feel scared and overwhelmed, but its time, its time to let those emotions take a back seat and for me to enjoy the moment, its not time not only for new beginnings but also for me to take control.






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