Missing someone you love.

Missing someone you love can occur for many reasons. It may occur due to death, separation, divorce and so much more but in my case and in this blog post today I am going to talk about missing someone you love as a result of death. I have talked a lot about the death of my mam on my blog and this was a huge part of my childhood but I also lost another figure in my life who was more than just a granddad to me, he was a friend, he was my best friend.

Not a day goes by where I don’t think of my granddad. I have always had a close relationship with my granddad but after my mam died we grew closer. I have built up a lifetime of memories with my granddad and they are the most precious things to me, nobody will ever be able to take them away from me and well I guess I want to share them with the people who read my blog. I find it hard to talk about my granddad sometimes but never  to blog about him, it just flows out of me like a river flows downhill.

I always have my granddad with me; after he died I was given his hat... to most people that would mean nothing but to me it means everything. My granddad had a panama jack hat and he wore it everywhere. When he would come up to our house on Wednesdays or any other days I would always take his hat and hide it or I would wear it around the house. It was our little thing.... It was that hat that it brought the two of us close... to me that hat symbolises my granddad. It’s like when my mam died I was given her first ever teddy bear to most people it would just be an old tatty ripped teddy but to me it symbolises my mam.I will never forget how my granddad would smile and say “I bet you didn’t know I could do that” when he would surprise you with something that he did. Sure the week before he died that’s what he said to us after he bet me in a game of pool.

He would wear my hat too :)

I had many names for my granddad and he had many names for me. I was his shove-over, his vampire and his whippersnapper. He was my gaga, my jellyfish and my grumpy. He meant the world to me and helped to fill a hole that was left after my mam died but after he died a bigger hole in my life was created. I miss my granddad and always will but I will never forget all of the amazing times that we shared together. 

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