Photo of the day. :)

Me and Emer lying on Ashlings kitchen floor. :)

RTE

While I was away in Boston I received an email form a very nice lady who works at RTE. She was emailing me about a show that is called Elev8 on RTE. The show is for young people and has lots of different people on the show, I was told that they were interesting in featuring bloggers and that while the lady called Shauna was researching she came across my blog. I guess that’s a good thing, my blog is getting more known and I like people reading my blog, I know some posts maybe be very personal but I like letting complete strangers know about my life especially if they are never going to meet me. I know that might sound a bit like” Why would you want everybody to know about your personal life?” Well to be honest I don’t like telling people who know me that aren't close to me things and that’s because I’m afraid that they might judge me but telling people who don’t know me through something like a blog makes me think that I might have inspired someone or helped them get through a tough time and let them know that there not alone. I have had some many different people help me over the years and showed me how to look on the bright side and in a way that’s what I’m trying to do in a less confrontation way.

I have got into this habit of going on about things that are unrelated to what I am meant to be writing about I’m sure you noticed that from the above paragraph and well some of my other post too. I have even started just randomly taking in class when I’m beside my friends and well that’s not something I use to do it’s kind of like I am talking to myself. You see there I go again!!!! Anyway back to what I was talking about in the beginning, RTE I had been emailing Shauna a few times to talk about the show and I also spoke to her on the phone. From the way she talked on the phone I felt at ease and relaxed and when she asked to meet me in person I was more than happy to go and have a chat with her. So today after school me and my dad headed into RTE with the help of directions from Shauna and a sat nav we managed to get there without getting lost which was a pretty good result for us.

It was a quick chat and while I was a bit nervous in the car on the way my nervous soon wore off. It was just about the show and what would be happening. I also got to meet the producer of the show who was a lovely person also. I didn’t really know what to say when I was asked about going on a panel on a LIVE show, could you imagine me on a live show. I know if my friends are reading this they would be on the ground laughing at the thought of me being on a live show. I guess it would be pretty cool, talking about everyday problems that children have in a light hearted fun way. I was be nervous but I could overcome my nerves pretty quick. Thinking about it know I would jump at the chance to go on the show, I would get to meet new people, make new friends and have a laugh. Yeah if I got picked I might have to miss school but I would catch up on all my work and I would not let my grades suffer and if I did notice I was struggling to keep up with all my work I would stop with the show and focus on my school work but I would make sure that wouldn’t happen.

It sounds pretty awesome and yeah I might have to work on thinking on my feet and being able to answer questions of the top of my head but with a little perseverance and commitment I would get there. I have no doubt that I would be able to do it though off the top of my ead. I would just have to get use to the whole Live show thing. I was told that they were going to speak with some more people that they were thinking of having on the show and well I would love to get picked and I think I would be lucky too but something tells me that from our little chat today and my lack of talking that I might not. But hey if I don’t get picked it’s not the end of the world, if my blog has got me a chance to have an interview on T G4 and to meet people who work at RTE and I have only been blogging for about a year who knows what It would get me in two or three years down the line when I have become more established. Now don’t be thinking that I am blogging for fame and fortune because believe me that’s not why I blog. I blog because I like it and sometimes I feel that some of my post might help people see that there is hope when they’re going through a tough time. The fame and fortune is just an added bonus and I don’t even get enough of that which is not a problem for me anybody who knows me would know I’m not one for getting a lot of attention it kind of creeps me out a bit :/

But I’m looking forward to hearing from them again even if it’s to say that they don’t want me on the show anymore because their lovely people. I better stop this post here, it’s almost half seven and I have to have my dinner and well go and learn some home ec for my test on Friday. Yeah I’m not even a week back and I have a test all ready, the joys of being in fifth year :/ I miss T.Y :( But fifth year isn't all that bad!

Photo of the day. :)

Lilo :)

It might not be T.Y but it can still be fun!

The one thing about T.Y that I loved the most was that it was fun and well my friends who went straight into fifth year pretty much said that it wasn't fun. When I finished T.Y that was the one thing I would be dreading was weather or not it was going to be boring and working all the time or if we were going to be having some classes where we got to have fun. The girls even made us this poster after our first day of fifth year......


But fifth year isn’t all that bad, I know its still the first week and we haven’t had much homework and I have no doubt that we will be getting more soon but to be honest I’m enjoying fifth year. I think that has a lot to do with the fact that I love the subjects that I am doing. I love home ec and biology and L.C.V.P or L.V.C.P how Aoife spells it is great too. The only one subject that I am dreading is drama but we only have that once a week on a Wednesday morning so it will be out of the way in no time and once I get started in it I will be grand and acting a fool in no time.

I had fun today, starting with religion we played a few games to help kind of break the ice as we still don't know each other very well. We also played a game where you have to count to 10 in L.C.V.P which was fun too. We were told that we might be going on a team building day to Wicklow with the sixth year L.C.V.P class as well to help us to start working as a team. It sounds like it would be a great day out too.

So for anybody who is in T.Y this year enjoy it and make the most of it, I know I made the most of my T.Y year and I achieved all sorts of things. I made new friends, got a first aid qualification, won awards and mostly I had a blast. So make the most of it, it will be over before you know it and remember the fun doesn't stop in T.Y. I learned how to have great fun in T.Y so now going into fifth year I know how I know how to have fun and enjoy myself even if I am doing work, study and homework don't forget you have to have fun too. :)


Photo of the day. :)

Me and Louise before we started our T.Y night performance. :)

You will live on forever in our hearts.



It’s crazy how time goes by so fast. This time last year I was on holidays in sunny Spain with my granddad and my brother Paul. Many people think a holiday in Spain would be great but not this holiday, this holiday was one that I will never be able to forget. While in Spain nearing the end of our holiday my granddad got very ill, he was taken into hospital where he passed away because of a heart attack.

During the whole experience of being in a hospital where the doctors don’t speak English and that I was on my own with my brother I was terrified. I was scared that my granddad was going to die but I was also scared because my granddad was blind and half deaf so I was scared for him. I tried to stay positive during the whole thing but it was very hard and in the end the outcome was very much a negative one.

While we were in Spain part of me thought because he is such a strong man he will pull through this. I mean he went into a diabetic coma once and came out of that stronger than ever and well I thought he was going to do the same this time round. But when me and Paul were told that he was going to have to be put on a ventilator and we were told to ring home we knew it was serious and well I could think about was how I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to him just yet. I wanted at least one more day with him.


After my mam died I got really close to my granddad and so did my two brothers. Me and Paul and Shane pretty much done all that we could to look after him while he was losing his sight and so whenever he wanted to go on a holiday he brought me or Paul to help him and well to spoil us as well.  We would go over every year with him and stay in his sister’s apartment. Each year someone else was brought along but I was the only one who went each year, I think that was because he bought everybody else to Lourdes but he never got to bring me. Anyway my granddad was everything to me, I could never imagine a life without him and when he died suddenly it was a huge shock not just to me but to everyone.



I have to say I took his death pretty bad and well he was my life. I went to his house every week and he came to our house every week too. He only lived down the road from us and knowing that I would never be able to go to his house and see him took me a while to get use to that fact. A year on im still not use to the fact that I am never going to get to see him again and I will never be able to go to his house and have a chat with him or play with his guide dog.

I look up to my granddad; he was kind warm hearted, looking, giving, fun and happy. He inspires me and I always try my best to make him proud. I know that he might not be here with me now but he is up in heaven somewhere with my mam and granny looking down on me watching out for me keeping me safe and for that I say thanks.

My granddad was an amazing man and even writing this post I am finding it hard to sum up how great he was in just one post. He was a knight of Malta, and honorary Carmelite,
a great friend ,an amazing granddad and so much more. I had many names for my granddad and he had many names for me. I was his shove-over, his vampire and his whippersnapper. He was my gaga, my jellyfish and my grumpy. He meant the world to me and helped to fill a hole that was left after my mam died but after he died a bigger hole in my life was created. I miss my granddad and always will but I will never forget all of the amazing times that we shared together.







My granddad may not be with me here right now but I know that he is up there in heaven looking down on me keeping me safe and sound. I miss you and I will never forget you. I hope your resting easy up there.Keep smiling. xx

                                                                                                                                             
            
The song that was played at his funeral.
  

School.

I have to say that I have been finding it hard to come up with something to write about over the past few days. I have had some suggestions but I haven't been able to write about them. Nothing much has been happening so I dont really have a lot to talk about. I went back to school and I had a great day, playing with the taps in biology, being scared by my Spanish teacher because of how happy she was and just in general the atmosphere of being back in school.

We still have to be put into some of our classes like maths and English which is going to be done on Monday hopefully. we also ave to be put into our Irish classes but that wont be done until after the junior cert results have come out. So right now I am dreading Irish because my Irish teacher says we have to try ad speak Irish as much as we can in class and well my Irish is not the best at all. I got asked to do an interview for TG4 about winning the Best youth blog in the Irish blog awards but after having people tell me I should do it I turned it down because I am not fluent enough in the language to go and do an interview on T.V. Now in saying that Im not the worse at Irish when Im in pass can keep up with the work and understand most things, but when the class is mixed between honors and pass im hopeless but all I can do is try my best I guess. Hopefully I will be able to keep up with all of the work from all of the classes and not fall behind. I only have seven exam subjects so once I get back into a routine of doing homework and study I should be grand. (fingers crossed)

The main thing that I remember from my first day back at school was what one of the teachers said to us during English, The more that you work in 5th year the less you will hate yourself in 6th year. That is the one thing that I am going to keep in the back of my mind all through the year and hopefully I will work during the whole year and then maybe 6th year wont be as stressful ans it can be for some people. We had classes but we didn't really do much work at all most of the teachers just talked to us about 5th year and 6th year and what we are going to need for each subject and things like that so it wasn't too bad at all.

We also had a bit of bonding between the 3rd years and the T.Y's but now were all 5th years. It was during Spanish and it wasn't nearly as bad as I expected. Im quiet and slow when it comes to making new friends but since T.Y i have come out of my shell more and when I had to talk to someone I didn't know in Spanish it was fine and I wasn't nervous like I would have been before T.Y. After we talked to someone we didn't know we then moved on and sat beside someone that we didn't know and we were then told that these were the people that we were going to be siting next to in class for the rest of the year or until our teacher decides to move us around. The girl I sit beside is quiet but she is also really nice and from the half a class that we sat next to each other for I realized she is good at Spanish which is always a help when your like me and struggle a bit with the subject, hopefully as the weeks go on we will get know each other better and become good friends.

Talk about a boring post.... sorry about it not being very interesting but tomorrow I will have a personal post up because it is the 1 year anniversary of my granddads death so Im going to write a post about the amazing man that he was and still is.

Photo of the day. :)


Here we go again.....

Well today I arrived back from America to a wet rainy Ireland and well to be honest Im glad to be back and out of the heat. I had a great time on my holiday for the most part, I loved Boston but I hated New York but it wasn't all that bad and well I survived. Today was also my last day of summer holidays and im not really sad about going back to school because I love school. That might make me sound like a nerd but I do, I love learning new things and spending time with my friends and having a laugh along the way.

Right now I think the best thing for me is school. Hopefully it will help me to keep my mind off some things and maybe just maybe it will help me to beat my depression. I am looking forward to getting back into the routine of school and getting some work done. I have to say the only part that I am really not looking forward to is the wight of my school bag and having to get up early in the morning but other than that I should be grand.

Lets hope this school year goes well. :)

Goodbye Boston... Hello new York. :)

Today I left boston the city that I came to love in the last three days and set out for new york city. We decided that we would get the train and it was a long train journey too but I slept most of it so it didn't seem all that long to me. I had Internet in the train so I was very happy I was  even chatting to Emer and Amy in the journey down I figured I could go on the Internet again on the iPod in  the hotel but I don't have free Internet there..... But not too worry I got my dads iPhone. So it's all good. 

New York is very different from Boston and it didn't take me very long to notice that it is mug busier than Boston and there is a lot and I mean a lot more people on the streets. If I had a choice of living in either Boston or new York I would without a doubt pick Boston..... I love Boston and maybe someday i might move there you never know.

So I decided to write a quick blog post and I'm going to keep writing them while I'm here in America about my trip... :)

Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. :)

Today we headed to the new England aquarium and to say the least it was pretty awesome. I really enjoyed it and I took lots of pictures..... I will make a slideshow and upload them when I get home because I'm blogging here on my iPod. It was really big and there was lots of different Fish there including sharks sting rays and turtles.  There was also a shark and ray touch thank but me being  me I was too scared to touch anything  in it I kept my distance with Paul. 

It was amazing there was so much there, I could dory from finding nemo and I also found nemo and Bruce and lots of other fish that were in finding nemo..... I was very happy because I love finding nemo. Just last week me and Paul were watching finding nemo on the tv.... I was very happy.  :) my favourite part was the penguins and there was lots of them and I love them so very much.  :)  free we went to the aquarium we went to do a spot of shopping after of corse getting lots following Pauls directions. But we got here in the end.

We finally found Quincy Market where Ellen degenerous was last week and I love her but warily she went home before we got to Boston :(  and fenual hall where we did some shopping which was fun. I bought an awesome hat and it has Elmo on it....  I will upload a picture when I get home because I absolutely love it :)  I also bout Emer a present and I hope she likes it because if she doesn't hen I'm takin it because I like it ..... Lol :) hopefully she will like it.

We also went to see liberty  bell but it was close today so we never got to see it but a well. I had a great day shopping and looking at fish it was a great way to finish my three day stay in Boston. Tomorrow we are heading to new York on the train. It takes four bourse to get there and I'm really tired so I will have plenty of time to sleep. :) 

And your out.....

Yesterday we wen to Fenway park home of the Boston red socks. I loved Fenway park, it was amazing. I like baseball, I don't have a huge interest in it like Shane or Amy but I have a fair idea of he game. I would follow the Boston red sox and my favourite player would have to be Tim  Wakefield the starting pitcher. I don't watch the games but I would  follow them during the world series on the Internet. Fenway park was really big and we went on a tour to all the different parts of the  stands.... It's not the easiest thing to do on crutches. We got to learn some of the history of the stadium and I also learned that it is the oldest baseball park in America. Afterwards I got a pair of red socks to put on my crutches because my hands were so sore. :)

After Fenway park we then made our way on the subway which I don't like at all but anyway we then went the JFK museum which was really cool too. It was all about John F Kennedy and his running for president and his death but there was also a bit about his childhood but no too much. Others was so much there and I would have loved to been able to take pictures but you learnt allowed. :(   It was really interesting and I learned a lit about him.... It would be defiantly something that I would love to do again if I was to ever come back to Boston in a few years.

I'm still struggling to get use to the time difference and also a bit with the heat but that's not too bad. The food here as well.... I'm struggling to find some food that i like and that I will eat but I'm managing and I guess I kind of have to get use to it. Tomorrow we are heading to new York on the train but today we are heading to the Aquarium  and then to do some shopping.....  :) 

Hello Boston!

Yesterday  I arrived on Boston with 
my dad and Paul and well what can I say, I haven't seen much yet but all ready I have fallen in love and think that I is amazing it's calm and quiet..... Well for the most part, when there's no sirens blaring but I have heard so many all ready I think that I might be use to it. We are here in Boston until Friday morning and then we are travelling into new York city..... Hopefully the hotel there will have free Internet and I can use it to blog. I don't know what I would do without my iPod on this trip.

We didn't do too much yesterday because we were all pretty tired but we did go and have a look at a few shops and we also went to the Boston public library. In there we seen the " torn in two" exhibition. This was about the American civil war and it is the 150th anniversary of the American civil war this year.It was small so we got around I quick but it was also jam-packed with logs of interesting and useful information. I liked and and because I like history I was really interested in it.

I'm still trying to get use to the time difference..... Right now I'm lying in bed awake  listening to Paul snoring as I'm writing this post. It's almost  5 am here while at home it's almost 10 am and that's why I'm wide awake because I would usually get up at around 10. I'm sure tho in a few days I will be use to it..... Well I hope so because I done want to be going home and go back to school after a week of not sleeping great..... That wouldn't go very well.

This base t been a very long blog post because we didn't really do much, but I think Paul has lots planned for today. I'm going to try and upload some if the photos from the torn on two exhibition and then I'm going to try and get some sleep. I'm going to say right now that in a usual post my spelling is not the best and I'm sorry if in this post it's even worse and if it is that's because I'm on my iPod so sorry.

Photo of the day. :)

I found it very hard to pack because of my little helper Lilo... I tried hiding her in my case so I could bring her with me but Paul wouldn't let me :(  Shes now gone to stay with Tom and her brother Mossy for the week. In the morning Im heading off to Boston and Im not really looking forward to the long plane journey but I think I will manage even with my crutches..... :/ I will try and post from my iPod if I have internet but im not promising anything.  I hope the rest of the summer holidays are great for everybody!


The assumption song. :P

Photo of the day. :)


Poland!

This year the fifth years and the sixth years are going on a trip to Poland and only 40 people were picked to go. I was delighted to have been picked to go. I really wanted to go after I did a geography project on the country, since then I have wanted to go and see some of the amazing things that Poland has to offer. I am looking forward to this trip and I don’t think I have ever been more excited about going on a trip before.

We are going during the Halloween midterm which is in like two months! There are so many different things that we are going to be doing in our short trip of four days. I am so excited about this trip and I cannot wait to go. I think it’s going to be even better because its a school tri[p so I get to spend four days in a different country with some of my closest friends. It is going to be an amazing trip. We get to go to a water park too on one of the last days.

I like history so I am really looking forward to going to the concentration camp because it is going to be a once in a lifetime experience. I am also looking forward to going to the salt mines, they look amazing and I think that will be something that I will never forget. This is going to be such an amazing trip and I am really looking forward to going.

Blues Brothers.

To choose this song I put my iPod on shuffle and chose the next song that came on......


Photo of the day. :)


Work experience!

As part of the L.C.V.P programme in fifth year you have to do work experience. Since my transition year work experience I have loved the idea of it. L.C.V.P was not my first choice when it came to picking my subjects for the leaving cert. I had originally picked Home ec, Biology, History late course. I then had to re think my choices when I was told that there were not enough people to make up the late history course and well I was gutted. I love history and was looking forward to doing it for the leaving cert. I could have taken the early history course but an I find that harder and I am not as interested in the early history as the later history.

So after being called back into Mr C’s office I came out thinking that I would do L.C.V.P because I don’t like business and I was not doing geography and I am hopeless at chemistry. I have to say though that when I found out that you do work experience it kind of swayed my decision and made me want to do it more. That’s not the only reason that I chose to do it, it’s more practical work and it was also describe to me as being like transition year in a class. So I decided that I would do it after weighting out the advantages and disadvantages. Sure I can’t get as much marks in it in my leaving as other subjects but it offers me some great experiences that could help me in the future so I decided I would benefit from doing this subject more than any other subject.

So after I decided on L.C.V.P I thought it would be best to work on finding a work placement. So I began thinking about what I want to do in the future. Over the years I have wanted to do many different things like medicine, nursing, physio ad after my work experience in the fire brigade training centre I even thought about going in to the fire service. After thinking about things for a while I have decided that I want to be a paramedic. I love helping people and doing first aid. When I thought about it and did some research it seemed like the thing I wanted it jumped out of the computer screen at me as the career that I want.

I’m still not 100% sure about it but it’s the most confident I have been about a career choice so far in my life. I know it will be hard work, my great uncle Stephen is a fire fighter and he was telling me all about it and that it’s a hard job but I think that I would be able to cope. I’m not saying I think that it would be easy but if I try and if I am determinate  to become a paramedic I think I will be able to do it and be good at my job too.

Now back to my work experience..... I decided that I would see if I could get work experience in a hospital. When I tried this in T.Y I was very unsuccessful in the beginning but I did get work experience in St Vincent’s hospital in Athy and it was a great experience too. This time I have managed to secure a place in Naas general hospital, a hospital that is familiar to me too so I think finding my way around will not be a problem as I have been treated there enough times to know my way around. I am really looking forward to this because I am going to be in a different department each day and all ready I have been told that I will be in the physio department and the labs. It’s going to e a great week. I can’t wait until the February mid-term now.

What colour is the wind?

This is a song that was played at both my mam's and granddads funerals, its a lovely song and when ever I hear it play it brings tears to my eyes.


Photo of the day. :)

My new house..... in the toy shop.    :p

Family!

It’s crazy isn’t it how close a family can be one moment and then how apart you can be the next moment. The past year for my family has been one hell of a year. every since my granddad died last august everybody seems to gate each other one moment and then everybody seems to love each other the next moment. It’s crazy but then again we wouldn’t be the Brady’s if we weren’t a crazy family. Me and my brothers are very close and that hasn’t changed at all and that is something I am thankful for I don’t know what I would do without them, most of the time when I am struggling and having bad days they are the people I look to keep me going. They might not even notice what they do for me on those days but they do a lot for me.

Me and my future sister in law are still as close as always if not closer and I am thankful for that too. She is more than a sister in law to me, she is my sister, my motherly figure and the one I know I can turn to when I need that women in my life to talk to and too look to for guidance. I can’t wait until the wedding in March to make it official that she will be my sister in law but to be honest I don’t need a wedding to make that official because I know she is going to be my rock for years to come.

Me and my dad......well that’s going ok and to be honest I’m happy with how things are right now between the two of us. I mean were talking this time four or five months ago we wouldn’t talk and if we did we were usually shouting at each other about something stupid and pointless. So if things keep going the way they are for now I’ll be happy and then things can keep getting better slowly but I know they will get better.

As for the rest of my family I never seem to know what is going on... I get told nothing in my house and well I don’t know if that’s because they forget to tell me or because they are trying to protect me. I do eventually find out what is going on. Like right now one uncle isn’t talking to me..... I didn’t even do anything. My other uncle is in a different country and half the time I don’t know when he’s in Ireland or in Spain! All I know right now that death is a horrible thing and it has tore our family apart. Since my granddad died there has been nothing but fights between my dad and my uncles. I wish that we could just go back in time so my granddad didn’t have to die. The way my family are acting right now is stupid and if my granddad was her right now he would be so disappointed at some of the people in this family. I hope to God right now that my uncles are reading this blog and that they realise that my granddad is up there looking down on us right now wishing that we weren’t fighting over stupid things and for his sake we could all just get along.

Sometimes making these kind of things public is what you have to do to get heard in my family and that is the only reason I am writing this post so that for once I get heard but mainly so that my family will come together again and remember and honour my granddad in a good way and stop all of this stupid fighting!

Fireflies.

Photo of the day. :)

Me Paul and Shane. :)

Our new chill out room.

I finally finished redecorating our conservatory. It took a while and it is finally done. I am in love with this room. I use to spend all of my time in my bedroom but now I think I am going to be spending all of my time in the conservatory!


My collage

Gingers new bed.

The rug Lilo loves to eat!

The amazing couch.

Our table that people sign.





Were the kids in America!

Seeing as I am heading off to America next Tuesday I thought I should put this song on my blog...... I also really like this song.


Photo of the day. :)


Me and Paul in Rome two years ago. :)

London riots.

I’m sure if you are reading this you have all ready heard about the terrible riots that are happening over in the United Kingdom at the moment. I think it’s safe to say that this news has made it all over the world because it is a big deal. I didn’t know too much about the riots until I looked up some information about them. I knew that they were happening but I was unsure as to why because I am not one for watching and paying any attention to the news very often.

For any of you who don’t know the riots started after a police officer shot a local man in Tottenham. The man was being arrested when the shooting began. The riots have been going on since this incident happened in Tottenham. They began in Tottenham where there were two nights of rioting and the riots soon spread to other parts of the UK. The riots are still continuing throughout the country. In response to all of this many British politicians have cut short their holidays including the Prime Minister David Cameron. The prime Minister has decided that they would recall parliament on the 11 of August to debate the situation.

To be honest I’m quiet shocked about all of this. All of this started over the death of one man. This is certainly not the way to deal with the situation and the general public should know that and I am sure they do. Yet you find some people that have nothing better to do with their time than to cause trouble. Right now in the UK there are many innocent people sitting in their homes too scared to leave the house because of the fear that they might be attacked by the rioters.

I understand that the police are doing everything that they can to control the situation but I’m sure that there has to be more that can be done to help prevent the situation from escalating any further than it all ready has. I know that by writing this post I’m not helping anybody in any way and I know that I am not making things any worse in anyway. I’m writing this post as if I am a news broadcaster today...... I didn’t really have anything else to blog about so I thought I would share my views on the situation not that I have very many views on the whole thing.

I really do hope that all of this violence comes to an end soon and I have faith that soon it will all be over and  the UK can start to get back to normal and business can get their premises fixed and they will be working again soon.

Fuzzy blue lights.

This is one of my favorite songs by Owl City.


Photo of the day. :)



Me and Aoife in school getting ready for our T.Y graduation. :)

Back to school.


There’s only two weeks left until I am heading back to school to start my leaving cert cycle. I am looking forward to going back to school I have to say, I like school. I like being with my friends and learning new things so the thought of only having two weeks left of summer holidays for me isn’t really a bad thing. I do like the summer holidays but often they can get very boring and sometimes three months off school can be too much for me anyway. Going back to school often means peace and quiet for stay at home parents but it often also brings high cost of book, shoes, uniforms and other school accessories.

We all know that at times money can be tight in some households and the added stress of having to pay for new books and uniforms can often make parents angry and stressed. I mean uniforms are great and I’m sure that there cheaper than having to buy your children lots of clothes for school if you go to on a non-uniform school but the prices of uniforms keep going up and up. For primary school it isn’t too bad in ways because you can often find a cheap uniform in a shop with deals and things like that but often because young children are growing it means replacing that uniform every year.

For secondary school the uniforms are very expensive but they don’t always need to be replaced as often in many ways that’s saving money  but buying it all for the first time in one go can be anywhere up to 100 euro and more than likely more than 100 euro. Adding to the high price of uniforms and shoes comes the books, and books do not come cheap by any means. 

This year I am going into fifth year and so I had to buy all of my books and well they were expensive, very expensive and I still have to get a maths book and a novel for English. All my books were bought new and yeah I would have saved money if I had bought them second hand but I didn’t so I can really complain too much. Only having seven core subjects for the leaving cert I have much more than seven books. Wouldn’t it be nice to only have to carry around seven books in you school bag rather than all of these:

Granted I don’t have to carry all of these books around all of the time but add all the copies and refill pads and folders to that it all adds up to a very full locker and a very heavy school bag.

My point of this blog post was to talk about how school can be very expensive and can cause stress to parents but I don’t think I did that very well, rather a bit of a rant about school. A well, but I have got back into the swing of things and hopefully I will be able to keep writing half decent post from now on to keep all of you interested in my blog.

Depression.

I have written a post about self-harm before and well now I think it’s time to write one about depression seeing as how often the two topics can be related. In my opinion depression is a lot like self harm in the way that people often don’t like talking about the subject. It seems to be something that you would only talk about if you knew someone who suffers from it or you yourself suffer from it.

I grew up not hearing anything about depression; the only thing that I knew about it was that if you were depressed you were sad. In some ways that’s all you really need to know when you’re growing up because often you wouldn’t find yourself being depressed or even know someone who is depressed. It wasn’t until I entered secondary school where I learned more about depression and that wasn’t even through school that I learned about it. I guess I learned about it from my own experience and it was when I entered third year when I learned what depression really was when I was diagnosed with depression.

To be honest I didn’t think much of it because it wasn’t bad depression and I wasn’t put on medication, it was something I didn’t talk about not even with my dad or brothers, when we were told we all just got on with it and didn’t even think twice. Sure none of my friends even really knew that I had depression either because I tried my best not to let them see me suffering and when I was around them I put on a smile and acted as if everything was ok. I just got on with things after I was told and soon I felt back to my normal self when I was heading into transition year, because I had learned how to deal with things and I was going into Transition year a new Siobhán from the Siobhán I had been during the summer.

I was still getting treatment every week by going to a psychologist and talking about things that had happened in the past and I guess if I wasn’t talking about things every week I would not have been able to cope with things. I didn’t think of myself as being depressed and I think that was because it was only my family knew about it and I was able to deal with it. Now after having a relapse and a very bad one at that only my family and closest friends know about it and well now the world wide web know about it too and I’m hoping that by telling my story it will help to raise awareness about teenage depression.

After this relapse I was put on medication and well I have to say it took some convincing and that’s because I was both scared and also worried about what people will think of me when they found out. The only thing that was going through my mind was if people found out that I was on medication that they would think I was crazy. After someone close to me convinced me that they would help if I gave them time to work and that things will get better I decided that it was worth a shot and then things might start to look up for me.

After I got put on medication I stopped seeing myself as depressed and it was more that I just suffered from depression and it wasn’t a big deal. I may sometimes still try to put a smile on my face so people don’t realise that I’m suffering. It’s not that I’m trying to hide things it’s just that I don’t want to be pitted or looked down on because I’m suffering. I’m not ashamed of suffering from depression and it has taken a bit of time for me to be ok with it and writing this blog post about my experience was a big step for me and I am happy that I have done it and well I don’t mind if people know that I suffer from depression because I’m not ashamed and I will overcome it and things will get better for me.

It’s taken me a while to see the bright side of this because I couldn’t see past the next 5 minutes a couple of weeks ago now I know that things will get better And I am hopeful that I will overcome it and that is mainly because of the people around me who support me and because I want to get better and to show people around me that it is possible. I am determined to get back on the right track and someday I will hopefully be able to look back on my experience and say to myself that I did good and I have come a long way from there and I want to be proud of who I am even if that means I was a teenager who suffered from depression. Hopefully I will be able to go on from here knowing that my teenage years will have moulded me into hopefully the person I want to be.

I hope that this post might help someone who is reading it and suffering from depression. I haven’t got over this and I know that it will take some time but with people around me who love and care for me that things will get better sooner or later. It just takes time and you have to be patient with things.  When I’m better I will hopefully be able to write a blog post giving advice about what I found helpful during my treatment and trying to overcome this. To find out more about depression click here.

Catch up!


Of late my blog has been very lacking in content and I don’t really have a good reason for not updating my blog as often as I use to. I guess m only reason is that I don’t really have anything to blog about anymore, and well my life is pretty boring so I don’t really have any exciting news to tell any of you. I’m going to try and write a few blog posts to try and make up for the amount that I have missed.

I guess the only news I really have is that for the past week we have been redecorating our house, I guess it’s been happening longer than a week but the main part of it has happened this week. We have now got a new kitchen and dining room area, our living room has been done up and we have also got our conservatory done up as well. At the start of the year we also got some of the bedrooms changed around a bit.

The conservatory was left to me as my project and many would say that wasn’t the best idea as I am hopeless with decorating but after all it didn’t turn out all that bad in the end. My idea was to make it into a “chill out room” for me and my brother mainly when we had friends over so that we could have space to ourselves and not annoy my dad and we would be out of the way. It only took about three days to have it done from start to finish and well everybody else did most of it and I just kind of stood there watching most of the time. The only thing that is still left to be done now is a big collage that is going on one of the walls of photos of me Paul ad Shane and our friends and things like that. I have been left in charge of doing all of that so I’m hoping to have that finished by Wednesday hopefully.

Once I have to room fully finished I will take some photos and upload them to my blog. I am delighted with how the room turned out and I am glad my dad let me do it eventually after weeks of nagging him about getting it done up. There’s not much other news from me really.

 I’m jetting off to Boston next Tuesday with my dad and Paul for three days and then was heading to America for four days. I’m kind of looking forward to going especially after everything that has been going on the past couple of weeks between friends and family maybe a break is all I need to get me back on track and ready for school. I am however dreading the flight, it’s not that I have a fear of flying or anything like that I am very good when it comes to flying the only problem I have is when it comes to taking off I really hate that because that scares me but after a few minutes I’m fine. The length of the flight is another thing that I kind of have a problem with as sometimes I can get very restless when I have to say in the same place for a long period of time but I’m sure that I will survive. I also get very scared sometimes in case something will go wrong on the plane but I’m sure Paul will manage to keep me calm and quiet before we get onto the plane and I shall be fine.

Hopefully I will get back into blogging and have some half decent post for you to read I’m going to start working on a few different post and see how that goes.

Keep holding on.

Photo of the day. :)

This photo was taken from when we had a Harry Potter day and we all dressed up to watch all of tuhe movies... I gave up after film five.

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